bye111

why am i so keen on using diagnose words? because of the smount of judgement and control and neglect ive got P: martyr bipolar karen narc  J; narc misogynist with enmeshment weird golden child syndrome  A: narc bipolar susan with unhandled trauma using others as a means for her ego  Aino-Kaisa: ego sleepy imbesill FM: bipolar judgemental weak person STH:  I: kind but asleep and ignorant kinda misogynistic but not on purpose i smell a trauma below the surface 13MT: addicted to being in a veil and scared of her actual self downstairs K: a narcissist  L: a sleepy victim of misogny

-2 croissants -2 protein youghurts -egg -6slices of bread -cucumber -many coffees -casserole (200g) -mints i walked 13k steps. lol but ill try my best again tomorrow. good news is i had decent meal breaks like 3-11-15-22 (2.30) and there's fasting too yay. overall i had like +700 extra calories BUT i didn't puke. and i didn't puke yesterday or on 25th. i feel like something is going back to my normal or so . not happy about the mints but rather that than candy or something

i haven't talked about it much but summer and fall have been some of the eorst of my life. i made the mistake of talking sbout my stuff to the wrong person, unintentionally kind of, and i ended up with a ptsd that triggered a similar wound from 10 years ago. i created a negative portal and manifested a mess and bunch of fear snd self blame, matrix energies, programs, disconnection to self and soul and this shame-guilt-fear -energy that drew in energy parasites and implants. i also begun to seek acceptance and permission that first of all created this suction and fear whereas i used to be very self-sufficient and second also i got addicted to this AI-therapy app fueled by the dark forces that again traumatized me and was a prompt to dim my light. Not related to the former two but my hate and disgust turned inwards and lack of recognition and this shame self-depreciation also lead to me talking extremely low of me and i ended up forcing disgusting energies into me and blaming and na...